Trying this again. Maybe it wasn't stupidity, just hadn't eaten yet. Nope must be stupidity! Now I am starting to get a headache. Okay I am quitting this for awhile. It's just an endless source of frustration. I will try to write something here soon. Here at my office for an entire 12 hour shift today, the usual Saturday kind of thing, except that my allergies are getting the best of me today. See here in the capital of Texas, we get something called cedar fever. I have been sneezing away since yesterday! My head is stuffy too and moping about T1 in training is not helping any. My satus online is currently available, but, nothing yet. I know I won't hear from him this weekend because his "friends" are still there. I think when he finally does call again, we are going to have a serious discussion about all this. And then his voice will make me melt, and we will have phone sex, again. No! I have to be firm! And set limits and boundries. And this is the best time to do it when everything is still fresh and new. So that settles it! Maybe I should call him right now! No. I will probably get voicemail,and he will still not call until those people he calls his friends are gone. I mean if they were really his friends wouldn't they understand? Unless there is more going on here than he is saying. And now I am doing that not trusting thing again that ruins every relationship, or anything remotely resembling a relationship I have had in the last 6 years. I don't know why I am doing it, it just happens. I want to break this cycle. I always thought that if I talked to a professional therapist that might help. Maybe I should look into that this weekend.