Okay I am not moping anymore, his loss. But, I think Now is the appropriate time to look back at some of our IM's. One, to reminisce. Two, to show that he really did act like this would be happening and I am not in fact crazy, just had poor judgement or was extremely blind (love IS blind). Three, because so far everthing that I have shared has been so cathartic for me. I will be sharing them with you all now.So today we are having a T1 in training/DC_guyy marathon. Enjoy! After I received a "smile" on that online dating service on November 10th. I decided that I was interested in getting to know this 5'10", 185 lb, intelligent white male with short brown hair and brownish/green eyes. I had read everything in the profile the moment he appeared on my dating screen! He was looking for a woman who isn't afraid to try new things, with a personality to act serious, cultured and intelligent in one situation, but very wild crazy and seductive when appropriate. He did not however, list anything in the section where you enter what your idea of romance is, what you value, and what you enjoy in your spare time. That shoud have been my first clue. That little voice, or feeling or knowledge that we all have that tells us there is a reason for that, wasn't very strong after I had read that he was from Virginia, and saw those pictures he posted. They had me intrigued (truly). I even had a little journalistic inspiration that I shared with him, regarding those pictures. Something about the three faces of Arnold.(not his real name but you get an idea) It was supposed to make him laugh. But I got the feeling that it fell on deaf ears. No sense of humor is the second red flag that I didn't pay attention to. I forgot that when that happens I am supposed to run away. But after a couple of days, we exchanged IM addresses, and what I now call "the deception" began. (As usual, actual names and or e-mail addresses have been changed to protect the innocent, and in this situation I am not sure who that applys to anymore) Session Start (Yahoo! -Goddess:DC_Guyy): Wed Nov 12 11:21:45 2003 *** (Link: DC_Guyy)DC_Guyy has added you to their contact list with reason: "its me arnold" You may choose to (Link: DC_Guyy)accept or (Link: DC_Guyy)deny this action. You may also (Link: DC_Guyy)add this user to your contact list or (Link: DC_Guyy)ignore this user. *** You have been successfully added to DC_Guyy's contact list. DC_Guyy: hi, i just got your email Goddess: Great! Goddess: What did you think? DC_Guyy: i like it DC_Guyy: so i think i saw two pic of u now Goddess: Right Goddess: And I saw three of you DC_Guyy: yes DC_Guyy: you are very attractive! :) Goddess: Thank you! Goddess: As are you Goddess: :-) DC_Guyy : my real name is jake DC_Guyy: arnold is my middle name Goddess: Ahhh Goddess: Okay then Jake Goddess: I really like the name Jake much better Goddess: Do you? *** "DC_Guyy" signed on at Wed Nov 12 11:26:59 2003. DC_Guyy: i like jake better Goddess: So you are in Virginia? Goddess: yes. live in va. work in dc Goddess: Okay. What do you do? DC_Guyy: im going to lunch. ill tell you when i get back DC_Guyy: bye for now Goddess: k Goddess: bye Session Close (DC_Guyy): Wed Nov 12 11:32:03 2003 Session Start : Wed Nov 12 13:23:36 2003 Jake(DC_Guyy): r u htere [Offline Message (Wed Nov 12 12:45:31 2003)] Goddess: Hello I am here Session Close (Jake(DC_Guyy): Wed Nov 12 13:27:43 2003 Session Start Jake(DC_Guyy): Wed Nov 12 13:55:25 2003 Jake(DC_Guyy): im back too Goddess: Hey there Goddess: How was lunch Jake(DC_Guyy): how old r u Goddess: 34 Jake(DC_Guyy) winking smiley Goddess: i believe it says so in my profile...why? Jake(DC_Guyy): yes, but i forgot. and people lie on there profiles Goddess: lol Goddess: I forget that being online people can actually say one thing and not mean it Jake(DC_Guyy): how old did mine say? i have real problems about getting old Goddess: I try to be very forthcoming Goddess: what do you mean? Jake(DC_Guyy): what was my age on my profile Goddess: Aren't you like thirtysoemthing? And what I meant by that question is what do you mean you have problems with getting old? Goddess: Are you afraid of it? Goddess: Hold on let me look it up again...or are you going to tell me your age Jake(DC_Guyy): yes, i dont want to get old. im 38...i think it say im 34 or 35. everything else is correct. i have never been married and have not kids Goddess: So you lied about your age huh Jake(DC_Guyy):(winking smiley) dont tell anyone Goddess: WEll I guess I can't really be upset about that since it was just this year that I realized I am 34 I really actually fooled my self into thinking I was 33 for a few months Goddess: I even had my family believeing it for awhile Goddess: lol Jake(DC_Guyy): lol Jake(DC_Guyy): how tall r u Goddess: Now those pics you have on you rprofile, how recent are they? I am 5'7'' you? Jake(DC_Guyy): within 6 months...like summer time Goddess: cool Goddess: are you really 5'10'' Jake(DC_Guyy): ummmm, okok....5 9 Goddess: Oh no Goddess: are you kidding Me? Jake(DC_Guyy): :-P Goddess: LOL Jake(DC_Guyy): r u really 5 7 Goddess: yes! Goddess: Okay...so are you 5'9' or 5'10'? Jake(DC_Guyy): do you wear heels? Goddess: a lot! Jake(DC_Guyy): i think we will be ok. beside, it will just make kissing you easier!!! LOL Goddess: hahaha Jake(DC_Guyy): what is your name in (online dating service) Goddess: Goddess Goddess: and you are DC_Guyy Jake(DC_Guyy): YES Jake(DC_Guyy): I CANT FIND YOUR ADD..LOST U Goddess: Iknow i just felt like being redundant Jake(DC_Guyy): I FOUND IT!!!!! Goddess: good Jake(DC_Guyy): do u have more pic?? Goddess: What else do you want to know? Jake(DC_Guyy): why r u single? what do you think about long distant relationships Goddess: Oh. Well I think I sent you the two most recent ones of me already, those were taken in October of this year Jake(DC_Guyy): i have the one on your profile and the on you sent me Goddess: I am not really sure about long distance realtionships cuz I have only had one, but I was living with him for four years before that Jake(DC_Guyy): well, as you know i live in va Goddess: He then moved and it was really difficult, but we ended up not getting married after all. Good thing I didn't rent any gazebos or anything Goddess: Yeah Goddess: I know Jake(DC_Guyy): i like the way u look!! Goddess: We don't really know each other yet though...and I would have to had met you and been with you and blah blah blah before I would consider it a relationship...and if it got to that point then I guess I would just have to cross that bridge if I come to it Goddess: I like the way you look too...assuming that is really you! Jake(DC_Guyy): :-P r want more pic. Jake(DC_Guyy): i have a cam at home also Goddess: yeah Jake(DC_Guyy): by the way, is that really you?? lol Goddess: lol Goddess: I wish I had a webcam hooked up at work so that you could see for yourself. Goddess: Are you sending me more pics? Jake(DC_Guyy): i have other pic here of me at work but my ex is in most of them Goddess: Well I don't mind...she is an Ex though right? Goddess: lol Jake(DC_Guyy): yeah! lol Goddess: Bring it! Jake(DC_Guyy): can you expect is through yahoo Goddess: I am waiting Jake(DC_Guyy): it say waiting on you to accept Jake(DC_Guyy): let me just email them Goddess: yeah Goddess: If you are trying to IM them to me I don't think I can accept because I use Trillian...They don't allow us to have IM at work. Jake(DC_Guyy): i just eamiled them Jake(DC_Guyy): what is trilliam Goddess: Trillian is a Messenging kind of service, I signed up and can use Yahoo, Hotmail, and Aol. Jake(DC_Guyy): ok Goddess: But I only have Yahoo and Hotmail accounts Jake(DC_Guyy): well, i emailed them to u Goddess: Thanks. You look different.When were these taken? Goddess: Not a lot different just a little...oh so I guess your last name is Small Goddess: Was that in Mexico? Jake(DC_Guyy): i think about 1 1/2 year old Jake(DC_Guyy): no, i usa Goddess: Oh where? Jake(DC_Guyy): in pa Goddess: Vacation? Jake(DC_Guyy): what? they pic was in pennsylvania...a wedding Goddess: Okay Jake(DC_Guyy): oh, the one sitting was in pa. the one standing was in maryland Goddess: Well when you can I would love for you to take some pics with your webcam and send them to me. Jake(DC_Guyy): will u be online tonight...you can see me live! :D Goddess: I don't have a computer at home right now. Goddess: I wish I could though Jake(DC_Guyy): ok Jake(DC_Guyy): so what kind of guys r u attracted to Goddess: Nice, sweet, sensitive, with a good sense of humor, intelligent, attractive ( to me) I realize that my idea of attractive is not always the mainstream idea and I am okay with that Jake(DC_Guyy): what?? r u saying in not attractive... Jake(DC_Guyy): you may receive new pic tonight....im not sure now! :D Goddess: No I am saying you are totally attractive Goddess: Ohhhh Goddess: \:'S Jake(DC_Guyy): lol Jake(DC_Guyy): i want more pic of u Goddess: you will get some new ones soon when they are taken...hopefully by this weekend. My friend Jenna and I are going to Houston to donate Platlettes for a friends mother in law who is fighting Leukemia, We decided it would be a good time to stop along the way and "smell the roses" so to speak. Take a few pics, and just enjoy the time we have left since she is leaving for Jersey in two weeks. Jake(DC_Guyy): r uthere Goddess: yeah Goddess: I just sent you an im Goddess: about going to houston Goddess: didn't you get it? Jake(DC_Guyy): yes Goddess: k Jake(DC_Guyy): im impatiently waiting on the pic! ;) Goddess: Sorry it takes a while sometimes I get busy and have to type in between *** "Jake(DC_Guyy)" signed off at Wed Nov 12 14:55:56 2003. Session Close Jake(DC_Guyy)Wed Nov 12 14:56:12 2003 Session Start Wed Nov 12 14:58:03 2003 Goddess: Where did you go? Session Close (Jake DC_Guyy): Wed Nov 12 14:59:44 2003 Session Start Wed Nov 12 15:11:03 2003 Jake(DC_Guyy): im back Goddess: What happened? Session Close (Jeff(EastCoastGuy)): Wed Nov 12 15:12:00 2003 Session Start Wed Nov 12 15:16:24 2003 Jake(DC_Guyy): boss was talking to me Goddess K Goddess: So I get my pics tonight? Jake(DC_Guyy): let me look Goddess: Look for what? Jake(DC_Guyy): oh, i though it said did you get my pic?? lol Goddess: lol Goddess: I odn't have any more, well any others that are recent Jake(DC_Guyy): sent the not recent ones...please Goddess: No they suck Goddess: they were before I started doing pilates Jake(DC_Guyy): coem on Jake(DC_Guyy): come on Goddess: Why would you want to see pics of me that don't look like me anymore Jake(DC_Guyy): pilates? Goddess: yeah Jake(DC_Guyy): i must say you look sexy in the pic you sent me Goddess: Thank you again Goddess: i will try to send one of me before k Jake(DC_Guyy): :-* Goddess: Kay sent you pic Goddess: did you get it? Jake(DC_Guyy): yes and i liked it a lot! Jake(DC_Guyy): you have a sexy look to you. i like it Goddess: LOL Goddess: gOOD Jake(DC_Guyy): your body looks nice! ;) Goddess: it does? Goddess: thanks Jake(DC_Guyy): yeah Goddess: WEll sweeheart, I should probably get back to finishing my day here at work Goddess: I really enjoyed talking to you today Jake(DC_Guyy): me too Jake(DC_Guyy): is was nice Goddess: very Jake(DC_Guyy): if you want you can call me Goddess: really Jake(DC_Guyy): 202 555 5555 cell Goddess: k Goddess: Mine is 888 555 5555 at work my cell is temp disconnected Goddess: But I am usually here from 7-5 Jake(DC_Guyy): ok, i want to hear you voice Goddess: I want to hear yours too...but, what if we don't have naything to say? Jake(DC_Guyy): im sure we will Goddess: k Goddess: if youre sure Jake(DC_Guyy): would be better in person...that way if we ran out of things to say we could just kiss! lol Goddess: lol Goddess: i am really giggling out loud no talughing Goddess: not laughing Jake(DC_Guyy): ;) Goddess: LOL Jake(DC_Guyy): you seem nice Goddess: so do you Jake(DC_Guyy): t u Goddess: Well if you want ot call me just make sure that you talk to me, we have alot of people workign here and It can be confusing for the other receptionist well everything is confusing to her, but anyway, I guess I will talk to you later Jake(DC_Guyy): ok, i will Goddess: K Jake(DC_Guyy): can u call my 800 now Goddess well you didn't give me an 800 # I gave you one though you can call me on it Jake(DC_Guyy): can i call u now. or i can give you mine Goddess: just call me already Jake(DC_Guyy): ill call now Goddess: k Jake(DC_Guyy): will u pick it up Goddess: yes Jake(DC_Guyy): ok Jake(DC_Guyy): hello Goddess: What are you doing Jake(DC_Guyy): im calling you Jake(DC_Guyy): pick up the phone *** "Jake(DC_Guyy)" signed off at Wed Nov 12 16:08:27 2003. Goddess: Good night Session Close (Jake(DC_Guyy)) Wed Nov 12 16:08:45 2003 When I heard his voice for the first time, I thought he sounded, well, I want to say gay, but just so you understand, I haven't anything against gay guys. Quite the contrary, Some of my best friends, even family members are gay. So I think I have a good idea about what I am talking about here. Maybe that was it, I always fall in love with the gay guys. But back to the voice. Soft but still manly, with a little bit too much emphasis on the S's. Flirty and just a tad bit suggestive. And the one thing that makes me just melt straightaway, he has an accent. Not Brooklyn or New York which would've turned me into a bubbling, liquified mass. No It was more subtle, but strong enough to make me feel very flush, about eight times during the conversation. Especially when he said my name. And a very nice conversation it was. He was appropriately interested in finding out more about me, and even asked me what I wanted to know about him. I decided at the end of the conversation that I was definitely interested in persuing this further.